HEY LUSH, HAVE FUN. it's the weekend.

erhfufkdfksdjfk

Wed, 30 Nov 2005 22:02:34 GMT

so, as the girl who never takes time off of work, this is day number four that i've been out sick. last thursday or so my throat started to hurt a little, but that, by no means, stopped me from eating a ridiculous amount of stuffing and bisquits at my grandma's house for thanksgiving. by saturday by throat hurt so bad that i couldn't eat because it hurt like a mother to swallow so i bought a bunch of cough drops and other stupid remedies that never ever work with my last $20 and went to bed. i woke up four in the morning, stayed up til seven, had to have mom dukes call me out of work because i couldnt talk or swallow. so i went to the doctor, but not until like nine that night. medemerge closes at ten and by the time the doctor finally came in to see me he looked down my throat and told me i had strep without doing any tests on it or anything. so i got medicine for strep and he told me i would feel better by the next afternoon or so. by the time tuesday rolled around i felt no better so i went back to medemerge and saw a different doctor who told me i didnt have strep, but it looked more like mono. so i got a blood test and a throat swab and almost gagged on a nurse. test came back negative for mono. but what i do have is a virus that acts like mono but only lasts a cople days instead of a couple months.

the whole medical field is a crock of shit.

but i am going back to work tomorrow at four, which is, sadly, actually pretty exciting.

BOO

Wed, 09 Nov 2005 23:58:59 GMT

holy jesus, so its been two months since i've written and i wouldn't be surprised if a lottt of people ended up deleting me.

so, i still work too much, and i have been sick on and off, most likely from being overworked and sleep deprived, but i've been trying to take care of myself and take vitamins and all that jazz lately.

but aside from all that, i've been happy lately. and i got my computer back, so maybe i'll actually, you know, start updating!

the picture's far to big to look at, kid.

Mon, 05 Sep 2005 02:32:16 GMT

soooo, this is worth writing about.

my mother was coming home to drop my brother off and go back out someplace. before she left she asked me to come out and sit in the car for a while because she had some stuff to tell me. so, we're talking about random bs. we see my 78 year old neighbor from across the street, clearly drunk, hobbling over to the car. she starts of with "patttti, nicoleeeee, i haven't seen you in so long. this is the perfect excuse." so she informs us that her keys are locked in her car. her house keys are in the car. the spare keys to the car are in the house. so she asked us if we could call the edison police to come over and get her car door open. now, in a trailer park, if you call for one cop, about seven end up coming, so we told them that there was no emergency, but we needed some help with a lock. but since the car wasn't running, and there wasn't a child or an animal locked in the car, the cops wouldn't come out, even though we tried everything to sucker them into coming out. and a locksmith would be a lotttt of money, especially on a holiday weekend, so we didn't want to have to do that. so we got a ladder, and pushed the screen over her kitchen sink in and i climbed through the window. so, i'm in, i thought i was in the clear. only she has a deadlock on the front door, so without the key, i couldn't even get that door open from the inside. so, there's a back door to her house, only she doesn't use it and didn't know how to unlock that one, but since i couldn't even find a lock on the knob, or a lock at the top, that door seemed to be jammed. aaaand to top everything off, the woman, like i said, was partying it up all day, and while she knew there was a spare key to her car in her house, she couldn't remember where it was. so now her house keys were locked in her car, her spare car keys were missing the house, and i was locked inside her house. so my mom was just about to call the cops to tell them that i wasn't locked in the car, but i was stuck in the house. and we were gonna add in that the house smelled like gas, just to assure they would come. she was in the middle of calling, when i found the lightswitch in the hallway, and i figured out that the back door did, in fact, work, but that it had one of those practically meidevil locks at the bottom, so right as my mom was getting connected to the police station, i swung the back door open. as soon as she got in she remembered where the key was.

aaaaand the kicker of the whole story: the woman was boozing all day at the avenel picnic, but she didn't drive there because she knew she would be boozing all day there. so she took a cab. she doesn't carry a purse, and she didn't want to put her house and car keys in the mailbox because anyone could find them and break into her house. so, to avoid anyone getting to her keys, she locked them in the car, and safely tucked them underneath the cushion on her drivers seat. the keys were safe. even from her. she claims to have been sober when she did this.

that was fun.

did i mention when i see you it stings like hell?

Tue, 30 Aug 2005 21:07:41 GMT

what what?? an update??

yes, kids. my computer is not yet fixed. and when i do get it fixed it's going to cost me about $750. i still work all the time, but it's starting not to suck as bad. what else would i be doing with my time anyway.

other than that, things have been ok. i got really drunk the other night and don't remember much of what happened. ugh. stupid teenage mistakes.

i'll write again hwen something happens.

Mon, 01 Aug 2005 02:39:31 GMT

so. i may have just killed my computer about an hour ago after spilling soup on it. actually what happened was a spilled it on myself and then dropped it. onto my computer. which sucks a lot.

other than that, i do nothing but work. life in unexciting.

each day gets more and more like the last day.

Tue, 05 Jul 2005 04:56:57 GMT

i haven't written in quite a while. but i haven't done anything in quite a while. so it all evens out. i seriously feel like all i ever do it work anymore. it seems like i don't have the time for anything i want or need to do. and i feel bad for pretty much dropping off the face of the earth, to the very limited amount of people who actually do like to hang out with me, but between the two jobs, i work every day pretty much. since i started my second job, which was about a month ago, almost? i think? i don't even know, i've had, i think, one full day off. i'm at least one of my jobs everyday, and when i'm really reallllly lucky, i get to work at both. all the standing is definitely taking its toll on my knees.

i've been so busy, i didn't even get to mention that my brother left for my dad's house! for maybe 5 weeks! excellllent. but, not really, because i still never have time to do anything. the day he left, though, i worked at the booze store from 12-8 and then i went to keith's party with my mom, val and crystal and got tanked and apparently hit on some people. that's pretttty much been the highlight of the past month.

but speaking of, on the sixth, it's been exactly two years since my dad moved out. it's insane how quickly two years can go by.

the rest of this week should be easier. i even have a day off on wednesday. from both jobs. wooot.

but for now, i need to shower and then get some sleep.
i'll write again when i stop being a big complainer. kthnx.

Tue, 21 Jun 2005 02:55:33 GMT

ok, so, again, haven't done much but worked.
i'll start from thursday because that's as far back as i can remember.

THURSDAY i had to pick jimmy up from school. apparently he told somebody he was gonna kill himself after school. or something. so i had to go pick him up and talk to this counselor lady. then i worked at the booze store from 4-10. i don't remember what i did afterwards. but i most likely went for iced goodness with jen.

FRIDAY i worked at the restaurant from 9-2. then i went to get my eyebrows waxed and went to the bank to put in my last three paychecks; one from the restaurant and two from the booze store. so it was almost $500. woot. i was supposed to babysit that night, but it got canceled at the last minute, so instead i hung out with mel, luis, lorraine, and billy. we went to the st. matt's carnival for a hot five minutes until we realized it was lame. so then we tried to go to fairway golf, but there was a wait. so we decided to go over to luis' house to watch hitch instead.

SATURDAY i worked at the restaurant from 9-2 and then worked at the booze store from 2-10. afterwards me and jen went to buy some iced goodness and fast food.

SUNDAY i tried calling my dad at my grandparents house for fathers day, but my grandmother was rude to me and rushed me off the phone, so i decided i wont be calling there again any time soon. i eventually got in touch with him on his cellphone though, so i did my part. then me, mom and jimmy went out to breakfast at le peep. and i did all my laundry. that's pretty much it.

TODAY i worked at the restaurant from 8:30-3. i served and made $60. i had time to put gas in my cara and go home and change and then i worked at the booze store from 4-10.

aaaand the plan for this week:
TOMORROW working at the restaurant from 9:30-2:30.
WEDNESDAY restaurant from 9:30-2:30
THURSDAY booze store from 4-10.
FRIDAY restaurant from 9-2 (probably 2) and then booze store from 4-10.
SATURDAY restaurant from 8-sometime. i dunno. im serving, so its hard to say. then booze store from 4-10.
SUNDAY booze store from 12-8 and then maybe keith's party.

..yuhhuh. i think i might work too much. but the money is goooood.

also; there is a possibility i could get mono. not enjoyable.
aaaand also; my knees always hurt at work, so crystal was calling me kneecap today.

i got hoseddd.

Wed, 15 Jun 2005 19:19:35 GMT

List five songs that you are currently digging...it doesn't matter what genre they are from, whether they have words or even if they're any good but they must be songs you're really enjoying right now. Post these instructions, the artist and the song in your blog along with your five songs. Then tag five other people to see what they're listening to.

001. the shining // badly drawn boy
002. caring is creepy // the shins
003. suave // he is legend
004. bittersweet symphony // the verve
005. the widow // the mars volta

yep, there it is. but i'm not tagging anyway becasue i don't even think there are five people that read my lj. so, yeah, if you do see this, do it. otherwise. i did that for no reason.

but aaanyway, i haven't been writing lately, but i haven't been doing anything except working. between the two jobs i've been working pretty much every day at atleast one of them, sometimes both. i worked three weeks in a row at one of the two before i had one day off. this week i know i have sunday off from both jobs, so that's good, but i'll be lucky if i get one day a week off from now on. i feel like i'm gonna miss out on a lot this summer. but hell, i guess you do what you gotta do. for instance, monday i worked thirteen hours. i waitressed 8:30-3:30, had a half hour to put gas in my car and change my clothes before i started at the liquor store and then i worked 4-10 there. they've been giving me a serving shift on monday for the past couple of weeks now, so it might be like that a lot. i just hope i'm not taking on too much.

yeah, that's all.

Tue, 07 Jun 2005 04:07:10 GMT

so, i started at the liquor store. it's ok so far i guess. a lot to get used to. and that lottery machine, yeah, not a big fan as of yet, but they tell me once i get used to that contraption i'm gonna love it. so, between the two jobs, i'm gonna be working pretty much every day, with an occasional day off. which, sort of sucks, but you do what you gotta do.

but speaking of, i served today at le peep and i was fortunate to get some of the nicest tables today. and i feel like i did a good job today, so that's always a good feeling.

so, tonight i went out to friendly's with mel, tori and noel and that was super fun. lots of laughs, and man-sounding voice changes, for some ungodly reason, but it was definitely, definitely a good time.

i jumped in a biiig puddle and got my pants wet up to the knees, and it made me feel like a little kid. but i splashed mel so she yelled at me haha whoops.

on the drive home we talked about how fast this year has gone by, and how it feels like we should still be in high school despite the fact that we've been out for almost a year. and then we talked about prom and about how we liked our dresses and our hair, but about how it was so over-hyped and ended up being a disappointment. so then we came to the conclusion that one of these days, we should all get all dressed up in our prom attire and go out for tea , for no other reason that to look classy and hott and being able to wear such pretty things again. i'm seriously so excited and i definitely hope that ends up happening as it would rule hardcore.

other than that, my cellphone contract expires tomorrow--er--technically today so i'm switching to cingular and getting a new phone after work. amaaaazing

baby, i'm dyin'

Thu, 02 Jun 2005 13:50:51 GMT

so yeah. i don't update very often. but my entries aren't very exciting, so it evens out. i've pretty much just been working a lot lately. out of the past fourteen days, i've worked twelve of them. this thursday and last thursday are the only days i've had off. today hardly counts though, because i got a second job a the liquor store that my mom works at a couple nights a week, and i'm going to train for that from 2-10. then tomorrow back to le peep. then saturday back to training. then sunday, monday, tuesday and wednesday i'm back at le peep. i'm pretty sure i'm gonna do the same thing i did last summer and work the shit out of myself, but that's ok. i'm gonna need the money. monday i'm serving! so that's really exciting. i really do love it. granted, it's a pain in the ass sometimes, but at the end of the day it is totally worth it.

my entries suck. i apologize.

this mood of ours is temporary.

Fri, 27 May 2005 22:05:34 GMT

1. Your Full name: nicole marie.
2. Do you feel like your name fits you? no. its too plain.
3. Do you have an alter ego? If so, what is his/her name? uhm. no.
4. Where were you born? in a hospital.
5. Where do you live? new jersey.
6. Do you like to travel? sure do. but i don't do it very often.
7. What is your birthday? july 17th.
8. Do you have siblings? that's an understatement.
9. Do you have pets? not anymore.
10. Which was the happiest year of your life? tough call.
11. How old do you wish you were? twenty-one!
12. A movie is being made about your life. Who would you cast to play yourself? lauren ambrose.
13. Who would you cast to play your significant other? (if you have no significant other, cast someone anyway) someone hottt.
14. How would this movie end? probably very lonely.
15. Is it better to be famous or infamous? famous, i guess.
16. Youre going to die a natural death. What is the cause? old age?
17. Youre going to die a sudden, tragic death. What is the cause? savagely ripped apart and eaten by a school of hammerhead sharks.
18. How long do you plan on living? about up until i die.
19. What was the last song you got stuck in your head? ass like that // eminem.
20. Sing any commercial jingle. ....a healthy snack that smiles back until you bite their heads off...
21. What is your favourite element on the periodic table? uh..oxygen?
22. Sunrise or sunset? sunset.
23. Introvert or extrovert? extrovert.
24. Creation or evolution? evolution.
25.Action or reaction? action.
26. Unity or individuality? individuality.
27. Hugs or drugs? hugs.
28. Animal, vegetable, or mineral? animal.
29. Popsicle, creamcicle, or fudgecicle? popsicle.
30. Fight or flight? fight.
31. Who is your favourite historical figure? jefferson died of syphillis! and taft got his fatass stuck in a bathtub. some people rule.
32. Which historical figure could we have done without? a lottt.
33. What happened in the last dream you remember? too weird to even try to explain.
34. Do nice guys really finish last? generally speaking.
35. What are your favourite boy names? tobin, wes, nate.
36. What are your favourite girl names? jaleb, ashleigh, jade.
37. Open or closed? open.
38. White bread or wheat bread? wheat.
39. Is it better to burn out than to fade away? absolutely.
40. You put a quarter into a toy machine. What comes out? my quarter back.
41.What do you want to be when you grow up? beats me.
42. What were your favourite childhood toys? anything my little pony or ninja turtle related.
43. What was your first pet? a guinea pig. i used to hide him in everyone's shoes.
44. What annoys you? too many things.
45. What is your favourite action caption from the old batman tv show? (example. "pow" or "blam") i was quite fond of bam.
46. How many licks does it take to get to the centre of a tootsie pop? ask mr. owl.
47. The glass... half empty or half full? half empty.

WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON
48. Tightie whities. don't they lower your sperm count?
49. McDonalds happy meals. uh, i dunno?
50. Reality shows. fucking stupid most of the time.

51. Gummi bears or gummi worms? gross.
52.Would you rather sky dive or deep sea dive? sky dive.
53. Paper or plastic? plastic.
54. What position do you sleep in? fetal position.
55. Do you sleep on the left, right, or the middle of the bed? eh, wherever.
56. Sweet or sour? sweet.
57. What was your favourite after school special? nothing. that would interrupt oprah.
58.What is your favourite word? contraption. and recepticle.
59. Beach or mountains? mountains.
60. Mounds or almond joy? almond joy.
61. Do YOU feel like a nut? not especially.
62. To give or to recieve? to give.
63. Chocolate or caramel? chocolate.
64. Do you have any nicknames? sure do.
65. What does your name mean? ya got me.
66. Have you ever fainted? yuh-huh.
67.Have you ever had a crush on a school teacher? no.
68.What was the last thing you ate? french toast with granola and almonds.
69.Do you have any bad habits? too many.

WORD ASSOCIATION
70. Grey... rain.
71. Human... being.
72. Fruit loop... toucan sam.
73. Glove... oj simpson.
74. Plum... angus!
75. Structure... disarray.
76. Race... run.
77. Heart... blood.
78. Parasite... tick.

79. What was your first happy memory? to hell if i can remember.
80. What was your first unhappy memory? :points up:
81. If you could visit any time period, what would it be? the 80s?
82.What would jesus do? rock out with his cock out.
83. Make up a word and define it. duffalo= part dog, part buffalo. see the beast from the beauty and the beast.
84.Favourite kool aid flavour? i don't like it.
85. Favourite pick up line? is that a mirror in your pocket? because i can see myself in your pantsss.
86. Who was the third gunman on the grassy knoll? me, bitches.
87. What did you like to make believe as a child? nothing. i had a shitty imagination.
88. Did you have an imaginary friend? negative.
89. Would you like to live in a castle or a mansion? a castle. with a moat. and crocodiles.
90. Re-arrange some of the letters in your first, middle, and last name to form a description of yourself. eff that.
91. Do it fast or do it right? both, if possible.
92.What was the last book you read? 'diary' by chuck p. and it sucked. now i'm reading 'girlfriend in a coma' by douglas coupland.
93. Have you ever had surgery? nah.
94. Random fact about you...... i eat pizza backwards.
95. What is the first thing you wash in the shower? hair.
96. What is your favourite cereal? frosted mini-wheats.
97. If you could learn any foreign language, what would it be? french.
98. If you had the choice to live forever, would you? if i could do so without getting decrepit, maybe.
99. If you had the choice to be the opposite sex for a day, would you? in a second.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN
100. Fate? fate is for losers.
101. Ghosts? eh. i dunno.
102. God? i'm agnostic.
103. Big foot? sure, why not?
104. Soul mates? not really.
105.Aliens? it's possible.
106.Angels? nuh-uh.
107. Loch ness monster? sure, why not?
108. Heaven and hell? negative.
109. The Zodiac? to an extent.
110. Love at first sight? nah.
111. Karma? to an extent.
112.Vampires? eh, there's some weird people in the world.

113. If you had any super power, what would it be? read minds.
114. Would you use your power for good or evil? a little bit of both.
115. Name something nostalgic. birch hill.
116. What are your turn ons in the opposite sex? sense of humor, nice eyes, honesty, trust, all that jazz.
117. What are your turn offs in the opposite sex? liars, boring people.
118. What was the best compliment ever given to you? fuck if i know.
119. Which character from Scooby Doo do you most relate to? velma. awkward redheads represent, y0.
120. What is the worst trend of the present time? too fucking many.
121. Beer or wine? beer.
123. You cant sleep. What do you do? think too much.
124. Do you wear jewelry? affirmative.
125. What is your favourite smell? campfire.
126. What was the best decade of the past century? i dunno. didn't live through much of it.
127. Which is your favourite month of the year? july. birthdayyyy.
128. Do you smoke? no. but i like being around people that do.
129. Do you drink? like a fish.
130. What was your favourite subject in school? english.
131. What was your worst subject in school? history.
132. If you had to give up one of your senses, what would it be? sense of smell.
133. Do you follow your head, your heart, or your crotch? hah. that all depends.
134. Do you truely know who you are? eh. i think so.
135. Are you superstitious? negatory.
136. Are you sentimental? sometimes.
137. How many times a day do you eat? two. usually.
138. Are you more of a main idea or detail type of person? detail.
139. What is your favourite pie? apple.
140. Have you ever been close to death? not to my recollection.
141. Do you like roller coasters? yessuh.
142. Apples or oranges? oranges.
143. Are you hyperactive? most of the time.
144. Do you talk in your sleep? apparently i do when i've been drinking?
145. What is your favourite holiday? not much of a holiday person.
146. Do you go to church? nuh-uh.
147. At what age do you think you will be married? at the rate i'm going, never.
148. If you could open up your own business, what would it be? music store. or clothes store.
149. What was the name of your first boyfriend/girlfriend? aaahaha.
150. What is your weakness? kids.
151. What was the last movie you saw that made you cry? the only movie i've ever cried during was the virgin suicides.
152. If love were a flavour, which flavour would it be? vanilla.
153. If hate were a flavour, which flavour would it be? cinamon.
154. Have you ever been prescribed any drugs? Which ones? yeah. allergy medicine, pain killers, antibiotics, all that fun stuff.
155. Is lying sometimes necessary? not often, but on rare occasion.
156. Bubbleyum or bubblicious? they're the same thing with different names, pretty much.
157. What is your favourite curse word? fuck. how cliche.
158. Do you have any birthmarks? yessum.
159. If you could visit anywhere in the US, where would it be? boston. they have hott accents.
160. If you could visit anywhere in the world, where would it be? ireland. i could probably find someone paler than me there.
162. Do you feel like your physical self matches your personality? i never thought about it, but i guess it does.
163. What was the name of your kindergarten teacher? mrs. peterson.
164. Do you wear glasses or contacts? i have both, but i wear contacts most of the time.
165. How tall are you? 5'6.
166. How tall would you like to be? i like my height.
167. Your current mood: bored. and mad at pollen.
168. Do you dress up for halloween? sometimes.
169. Have you ever been in a car accident? sure have.
170. What is your favourite lucky charm? don't have one.
171. What colour of underwear are you wearing? black with white polka dots.
172. Do you tend to date people younger or older than you? i don't date.
173. Do your exes look alike? laala.
174. Do your exes act alike? laala.
175. Have you ever been in love? negatory.
176. What is your favourite kids movie? the nightmare before christmas. if that counts.
177. Have you ever hallucinated? no.
178. What do you like most about the opposite sex? sometimes i wonder about that.
179. What do you hate most about the opposite sex? that i have no luck with them.
180. Have you ever been on a blind date? nahh.
181. Would you want to be cloned? never.
182. Have you ever peed in public? uhm. in a public bathroom.
183. Are you an optimist or a pessimist? pessimist.
184. How did you find out that there was no santa claus? someone hinted that there was no such with when i was about four. and then i noticed that santa's handwriting was surprisingly similar to my mom's.
185. Pancakes or waffles? pancakes.
186. Are you on a diet? yeah ooookay.
187. Why is the grass always greener on the other side? probably.
188. Do you always want what you cant have? doesn't everyone?
189. Do you act stupid around someone you have a crush on? i act stupid around everyone.
190. Have you ever been arrested? close, but no.
191. Can you cook? hah. no.
192. Do you think its wrong/weird if a girl asks a guy out? no.
193. Do you have any allergies? fuckin pollen.
194. Ketchup or catsup? uh, same thing, right?
195. Do you believe there is a meaning to life? If so, what is it? to fuck up as much as humanly possible in my case.
196. What do you think about before you fall asleep? too much shit.
197.What are your thoughts on the nature of good and evil? what about it? do they both exist? sure.
198. Step into your cave. There you will find your power animal. What kind of animal is it? uh. a zebra.
199.What does your power animal say to you? zebras don't talk, jerkass.
200. End this survey with a quote: destiny is what we work toward. the future doesn't exist yet. fate is for losers. // douglas coupland.

golf requires goofy pants and a fat ass.

Mon, 23 May 2005 22:50:42 GMT

so i haven't written in a while, but pretty much since the last time i wrote my life has consisted of working a lot and hanging out with people. i waitressed yesterday and made something like $140, which is good shit, but other than that, not a lot has happened.

i was cleaning a little while ago though, and i came across a bunch of pictures that i haven't seen in about a zillion years ago because i simply forgot they existed. there were a lot of pictures from sophomore and junior year of highschool and it just made me think of how much things have changed since then. it's weird to see the group of people i used to hang out with and know all the drama and bullshit that didn't need to happen within the group and how i don't hang out with most of them anymore for that reason. sometimes it's fun to look back on how things were once, but it's hard to ignore how things turned out and why. despite everything that went on back in the day though, i've still come out of it all with some of the best friends anyone could ask for and that's amazing.

so, now i'm just sitting around listening to the songs on my mp3 play list on shuffle and it's unusually entertaining.

hold your head high, heavy heart.

Sun, 15 May 2005 18:05:24 GMT

friday was probably the scariest night i've ever experience. may i just make it perfectly clear to the male species that once you have to drive around a mall parking lot nearly running over girls to get their attention long enough to ask them to suck your dick and then following them close enough to hit their car and running them off the road after they refuse that you are, clearly, the scum of the earth and deserve to be shot? since friday i constantly been looking over my shoulder and checking the backseat of the car to assure myself that i'm not going to get run over and/or mouthraped, as jen, mel, and i so named it. ugh. some people.

friday, however did lead to the purchasing of the most amazing neckwear i have ever owned. i now where a boom box charm around my neck, and that ain't half bad. a lot of people commented on it at work yesterday. rock.

clothes shopping makes me frustrated. every time i have money to buy new clothes i can never find anything that looks good on me. when i have no money, like, say, yesterday when i went to look for clothes with jen i tried on a lot of clothes to entertain myself while she shopped, almost everything i tried on looked flattering. stupid lack of money.

so, i have off of work today. it's the first sunday i've had off in months and it was nice not to have to get up early. i'm hanging out with mel later today, i think, and then i'm watching the finale of survivor with the mom.

tomorrow i have work at 8:30 and i'm serving, so i'll have me some money with which, depending on how i do, i may buy me some new summer clothes, as i have almost nothing, ae up until this year, i sort of hated summer clothes with every grain of my being and whatnot. mel and luis are coming in and asking to sit in my section, which is exciting.

yeah, that's about all. back to drinking caramel coffee and listening to all the music i have on my computer. what a nerd.

how do you take your coffee, my sweet?

Thu, 12 May 2005 20:02:00 GMT

What Icons are for you? by ladyallie
Username
Favourite Colour
Sex
Your Love icon is...
Your Sad Icon is...
Your Happy Icon is...
Your Angry Icon is...
Your Food Icon is...
Your Animal Icon is...
Your Random Icon is...
Your Cartoon Icon is...
Your Sexy Icon is...

Quiz created with MemeGen!

the fan blades on the ceiling spin but there air is never cold.

Thu, 12 May 2005 01:27:47 GMT

there are three songs i have not been able to stop listening to the past couple of days:

i'll be // edwin mccain
everything i do // bryan adams
the shining // badly drawn boy

i don't know what it is, but lately these three songs have been on repeat. i've heard them a hundred times before, but lately they just are..different. it's odd.

that's pretty much all.

i'll be captivated..

Wed, 11 May 2005 03:05:27 GMT

01. Comment with your name.
02. I will then tell what song/movie remind me of you.
03. I'll tell you what celebrity you remind me of.
04. I will try to name a single word that best describes you.
05. I'll tell you the most memorable moment I've had with you.
06. I will tell you what animal you remind me of.
07. I'll then tell you something that I've always wondered about you.
08. Put this in your journal

yuh-huh. do that.

i've decided recently that i've either changed since high school or i've become a genuine fucking fake (holy oxymoron, batman!) since high school. a man came into my job three days in a row last week and i made some joking comment along the lines of "you know, sir, you've been here almost as much as i have lately." to which he replied something along the lines of "well, i like it here. the food is good. the company is good; everyone is so friendly here." i started to agree that all the girls are, in fact real nice, but before i could do that he corrected himself by saying "well, not everyone is friendly. but you are. you're the friendliest girl here." he then went on to ask if i was voted miss popularity or friendliest in high school, to which i, obviously, said no and he told me that i should have been. it was on the tip of my tongue to inform him that in high school i was a awkward, sarcastic girl who hid behind a mess of hair and a big fat novel. it seems like so much has changed since school ended, but i didn't for one second think that i had. which brings me to the conclusion that either there's been a change in myself that i'm too blind to notice or i'm a huge fake. i don't know which it is. although, i'm not even sure i want to know which it is anymore.

i don't know what it is with me anymore.

in other news though, tonight was fun. went out to dinner with mel and tori. friendly's obviously rules. as do those girls. after dinner we stood around in the parking lot taking some pictures and talking about topics varying from the existance of fate to gay sex. i don't know. never a dull moment.

tomorrow i have work and then i'm taking a road trip to montclair with jen to return her room key.

i'm so glad everyone has been ending school and coming home for the summer. i'm determined to make this summer the best one yet. it has to be

attention attention.

Sun, 08 May 2005 02:33:59 GMT

i hate the fact that i have so many things to say but i can never think of a way to put it all together and still make sense of it. i used to be so good at writing but lately it just feels like i'm at a loss. i'm not sure if it's just me being critical of myself, or if everything i have to say is complete and utter bullshit and has no way of being rationalized.

stolen from alex

Fri, 29 Apr 2005 20:15:50 GMT

comment on this and ask me five questions - any five questions, no matter how personal or weird - and i will answer them honestly. if there's anything you've wanted to know, but never felt like you could ask me, now is the time.

give us water, give us back our lives.

Thu, 28 Apr 2005 03:59:28 GMT

jimmy was supposed to come back yesterday, but he called in the morning crying like mad because he wasn't ready to leave my father's yet, so he ended up coming home today instead. and he's already driving me completely insane. is it bad to say that i can't wait until he goes back to my dad's in about six weeks? probably.

all i've done the past two days is work. for some ungodly reason, i just haven't wanted to go anywhere. or i did want to, but not enough to actually do anything. either way. work has been okay these past two days. slow though. i have off of work tomorrow. friday i work, then is beer pong! saturday i have off again. which will be good, as i'm sure i may look like a trainwreck. sunday i have work. monday they threw me another serving shift, which is good because i like it and it's good money.

yeahh, other than all that, nothing new. my mom is going away this weekend. she's leaving friday and coming back sunday afternoon, so i've got to watch the kid all weekend. my mom offered to let me slide on the three bills that i have to pay and she said she'd pay them for me in return, but i told her not to. oh, and i started reading 'girlfriend in a coma' today and i've only read a couple of chapters, but so far it's excellent. i need to get back into the habit of reading as it's been forever since i have done so.

yep. that's about all. exciting.
ps; hopefully my next update won't be such shit.

Mon, 25 Apr 2005 17:55:32 GMT

i haven't written since wednesday, mostly because i have barely been home since then. but, this past couple of days has seriously been amazingly fun:

THURSDAY i had work. i served and i brought home something like $80 which was good for a weekday. jimmy left for my dad's house! and i went to friendly's with koni and mel, which was fun.

FRIDAY i had work. i got out and went over to the nail place. i got my tips soaked off my nails and had acrylic put on my real nails. i got my eyebrows waxed too, and they seriously look perfect and i was so excited about them. when i got out i went home for not very long and then mel picked me up and we went to friday's to eat. we got home, waited for val to get out of work and me, mel and my mom met val and mama diane at the pool hall. we were supposed to go to the strip club, but because val had work until late, and we couldnt get there until almost 11 and our table would have been given away by then we decided that we'll just have to go some other time when we can be there by 9 when the show starts and get more people to go so we can be close to the stage. so anyway, we stayed at the poolhall from around 10:30 until a little after 1 and played something like 5 gaves. i seriously kicked ass, unlike usual and ending up winning every game so everyone kept announcing that they were on my team next time. haha. so anyway, got home, took a shower and mel slept over.

SATURDAY i had to be to work by 8, so my mom and mel were still sleeping when i left my house, which sucked a lot. at around 5:00 me and mel met tori at friendly's for dinner. tori had to leave right afterwards to go to jess' house, so me and mel picked up jen. we tried going shopping, but we couldn't find anything we liked, so we pretty much just drove around, and passed the quick n' easy on woodbridge avenue because it makes us laugh. i got home at maybe around 10:30 and went to bed before 11 because i was seriously so so tired.

SUNDAY i had work. when i got out i just went home for a while. my mom got home at around 4 and she asked me if i wanted to do something wild and crazy like taking a random trip to seaside, so we did just that. we packed up some smirnoff screwdriver in red plastic cups and went to seaside. it was so cold there. we just walked up and down the boardwalk and got some food. then we took a walk down sumner ave to see the hotel she's staying at when she goes away next weekend. then we went home, got home a little before 9 and we both layed down to nap and never ended up getting back up again. ocean air kicks your ass, it does.

TODAY i didn't have work, but i woke up early since i went to bed early last night. then mel picked me up around 11 and we went over to koni's. the 3 of us went over to le peep for some food. then we went back to koni's for a little bit. and now i'm home. i've got to do laundry today because i've had work every day since tuesday and then i've had stuff to do i've had absolutely no time to wash clothes, so now i have nothing at all to wear to work tomorrow. i'm not sure exactly what i'm doing later, but i hope i can find something, since jimmy comes home tomorrow. boo.

sometimes you gotta stop and remember you're not gonna live forever.

Wed, 20 Apr 2005 19:17:39 GMT

omg so work was so dead again today. and i thought i had off of work tomorrow, but it turns out, not only do i not have off, but i'm serving tomorrow. that's exciting. i'm glad that if i have to work on my day off it's to serve and not to host. woot.

right now my computer is telling me that it is 86 degrees outside. i just changed into my ugly homemade skirt and some flip flops and i'm waiting for mel to get out of school so she can come and pick me up. i'm going with her and koni to get their nails done and then i think we might play some ghetto-opoly. straight up, yo. haha.

jinmy leaves tomorrrrrrrrrrow! totally awesome.

at least i didn't get my heart broken anyway.

Wed, 20 Apr 2005 04:11:30 GMT

today was such a good day. i got up, took michele and the kids to school. got to work, and about ten minutes after i got there rose came up front said she wanted to talk to me for something. my neurotic, paranoid self, of course, thought that i had done something wrong and she was gonna say something along the lines of "hey nicole, you basically suck at life. either throw yourself into traffic or overdose. please," but it was just the opposite. she just told me that i was doing a great job there, and that i'm a good worker, i'm always on time, i work when they ask me to and that she's gonna throw me a serving shift every now and then and that they're looking into giving me a raise within the near future and that they love me there because i am such a good worker. yay! it was a good way to start off the day. i know when i first started, they didn't think it wasn't going to work out persay, but i think they were a little skeptical because i'm younger than all the other girls. there is one girl younger than me, but she's only there on the weekends, but it's working out so that's always good. so, there was that, and there was the fact that the weather was seriously beautiful today. it's after 11:00 and my computer is still telling me that it's about 70 degrees. so, i got home from work and my new hot pink converse had come in the mail today and they're super cute.

so, yeah, i like days like this :D

but because this entry was pretty short, here's a survey:

.x. What time are you starting this? 11.18 pm
.x. Name? nicole
.x. Nicknames? nikki, nikk, nikiki, peaches, pepa
.x. Date of birth? july 17, 1986
.x. Sex? girl
.x. Height? 5'6
.x. Eye color? blue
.x. Where were you born? somerset
.x. Number of candles on your last birthday cake? eighteen
.x. Pets? none. my dad has my cat at his house :(
.x. Hair color? strawberry blonde
.x. Piercings? five in left ear, four in right ear, and belly button
.x. Town you live in? edison
.x. Favorite foods? ramen noodles and taco bell
.x. Been in a car accident? yes
.x. Most annoying thing to say to me? "sooo, why don't you ever callllll me anymore?" especially when whoever says it never calls me and whanot
.x. Bedtime? whenever i pass out, usually real late
.x. Favorite TV show? the simpsons, friends, married with children, boy meets world full house
.x. Last person you went out to dinner with?: val, mama diane and john vincent
.x. Been out of country? nope
.x. Believe in magic? not particularly
.x. Ford or Chevy? that's a toughie. i've had both. and i've had no luck with either of them haha
.x. What are you listening to right now? the tv is on in the other room
.x. Have you ever failed a grade? no
.x. If you have, what grade did you fail? dot dot dot
.x. Do you have a crush on someone? um. sort of. but not. i dunno, weird situation
.x. Do you have a bf/gf? no sir
.x. If so, what is their name? dot dot dot
.x. How long have you been together? dot dot dot
.x. What are you wearing right now? pink tank top with a black one under it, some written-on jeans, and pink converse
.x. Would you have sex before marriage? yes
.x. Have you ever had a crush on any of your teachers? ew, no
.x. Are you a virgin? thus far, yes
.x. Do you smoke? not regularly
.x. Do you drink? yes. ps; beer pong next friday!
.x. Are you ghetto? i'm gonna have to say no
.x. Are you a player? again, gonna have to say no
.x. What are your favorite colors? pink and green
.x. What is your favorite animal? um..cats?
.x. Do you have any birthmarks? yessuh
.x. Have you ever gotten your ass kicked? no
.x. Who do you talk to most on the phone? don't really talk on the phone much, so whoever calls me
.x. Have you ever been slapped? yes
.x. Do you get online a lot? sort of. and if i'm not on i usually have aim signed on anyway
.x. Are you shy or outgoing? more on the outgoing side
.x. Do you shower? uhm, yes
.x. Do you hate school? i don't go to school
.x. Do you have a social life? haha to an extent
.x. How easily do you trust people? not very
.x. Do you have a secret people would be surprised knowing? probably not
.x. Do you like to dance? i can't do it well, as i am spastic, but it can be fun sometimes
.x. Have you ever been out of state? indeed
.x. Do you like to travel? sure do
.x. Have you ever been expelled from school? nah
.x. Have you ever been suspended from school? no, was supposed to, but i cried my way out of it because i'm a crafty, crafty girl
.x. Do you want to get out of your hometown? at least temporarily
.x. Are you spoiled? no
.x. Are you a brat? i can be
.x. Have you ever been dumped? no. it's awful hard to get dumped if you make it a point not to date
.x. Do you like snapple? love it
.x. Do you drink a lot of water? no
.x. What toothpaste do you use? whatever we have. usually colgate or crest
.x. Do you have a cell phone? who doesn't?
.x. Do you have a curfew? sort of. but it's always changing
.x. Who do you look up to? nobody
.x. Are you a role model? absolutely not
.x. Have you ever been to Six Flags or Cedar Point? i've been to six flags a grand total of exactly once in my whole life
.x. What name brand do you wear the most? don't really have one. i pretty much wear whatever i like
.x. What kind of jewelry do you wear? earrings, a necklace, belly ring, ring, watch
.x. What do you want pierced? i sort of want my tongue done, but i'm not sure i'll ever get that. other than that i want my belly button pierced a second time and an industrial piercing in my right ear
.x. Do you like taking pictures? yes, but i always either forget to bring a camera, or bring it and forget to take pictures
.x. Do you like gettin your picture taken? sometimes
.x. Do you have a tan? never
.x. Do you get annoyed easily? yes
.x. Have you ever started a rumor? not that i can remember, so if i did it must not have been too significant
.x. Do you have your own phone or phone line? yes, a phone line in my room, plus my cell phone
.x. Do you have your own pool? no
.x. Do you prefer boxers or briefs? boxers
.x. Do you have any siblings? jimmy, 13
.x. Have you ever been played? i hope not
.x. Have you ever played anyone? never
.x. Get along with your parents? mom, usually. dad, usually not
.x. How do you vent your anger? yell, scream, write, play loud music
.x. Have you ever ran away? no
.x. Have you ever been fired from a job? no
.x. Do you even have a job? sure do
.x. Do you have a lot of ex's? definitely definitely not
.x. Do you run your mouth? i try not to, but i can't help it sometimes
.x. What do you want a tattoo of? i want a couple of them, actually
.x. What do you have a tattoo of? </b> nothing as of yet</b>
.x. What does your ex bf/gf look like? pretty much invisible, he is
.x. Have you ever been bitched out? more times than i would like to have
.x. Are you rude? i'm not gonna lie, yes
.x. What was the last compliment you recieved? the one about being a good worker this morning
.x. Do you like getting dirty? nothing wrong with that once in a while
.x. What is your heritage? don't have one
.x. What does your hair look like right now? medium length, red, down, sorta messy
.x. Could you ever be a vegetarian? yes. i was for a little over two years, so i could probably do it again if i wanted to
.x. Describe your looks? gawdy, sickly pale, kind of short, reddish-blonde hair, blue eyes, pretty awkward looking. i'm hawt lol
.x. If you had to completely dye your hair it'd be what color? i want to dye it brown so bad, but i love my hair color, so i probably won't in fear of losing the color
.x. Would you ever date someone younger than you? uhm, maybe, but no more than a year or so younger i would say
.x. Would you ever date someone older than you? sure, but not too much older, i give it more than a year, but, yeahhh, not too much of an age gap.
.x. When was the last time you were drunk? couple weeks?
.x. How many rings until you answer the phone? however many it takes me to get to the phone. i don't count
.x. Have you ever been skinny dipping? noo
.x. If yes, when was the last time? dot dot dot
.x. When was the last time you went on a date? aaaahaha. "date"
.x. Do you look more like your mother or father? when i was younger i looked more like my dad, but as i got older i look like my mom
.x. Do you cry a lot? more than i'd like to
.x. Do you ever cry to get your way? no, i used to do it to get me out of trouble when i was younger, but i grew out of it
.x. Are you the romantic type? nooo
.x. Have you ever been chased by cops? followed home, pulled over, questioned, all that jazz, but i guess not necessarily "chased"
.x. What do you like most about your body? eyes
.x. What do you like least about your body? legs
.x. When did you have your first crush? ohgod elementary school
.x. When was the last time you threw up? it's been years :::knock on wood::: i have the most intense fear of throwing up
.x. Do you ever wear shirts that show your belly? yeah
.x. What about cleavage? yeah
.x. What is your screen name on AIM? slfproclamdloser or we both go numb
.x. Have you ever given a lapdance? yes, but it soooooo doensn't even count haha
.x. Have you ever recieved one? well, yes, but ditto the above haha
.x. Has there ever been a rumor spread about you? yep
.x. What is one of your bad qualilties? i'm too honest
.x. What is one of your good qualilties? i'd gladly take a bullet for you if you give me reason to
.x. What time are you finishing this? </b>12.08 am</b>

acting stupid, getting drunk with my best friends.

Sun, 17 Apr 2005 19:15:31 GMT

i'm listening to blink 182 and it reminds me of seventh grade. it's awesome.
work was so dead today. it was insanely ridiculous. i hate it when there's nothing to do.
in like twenty minutes i'm heading over to val's house. it's crazy nice out, so we're gonna go to the park. and then to lunch or something. mel is gonna hang out with us after she gets out of work at 4 i think. this should be a fun day. i definitely have to find my camera and batteries and bring it.

demented as the motives in your head.

Sun, 17 Apr 2005 04:30:40 GMT

this weekend has been pretty enjoyable so far. friday i worked until maybe 1:30. i was worried about some stupid shit that i thought i did, just some stupid money-related mistake i thought i might have made for about two hours of that, plus for another two hours after i got out, which i found out i didn't make anyway. megan came in while i was working and asked me if i would take her saturday shift next week (the day after i'm gonna be out at the strip club crazy late :() and it's gonna be a rough morning, but i agreed anyway because i can always use the money. so i got home, and a couple hours later mel came and we went out to go get some taco bell, then we went over to walmart to buy some ping pong balls (for beer pong!) and then we couldn't really think of anything to do and we couldn't get in touch with jen so we just went back to her house for a while. nicole m and her friend from school picked us up at around 9 and we went over to visit at her grandmother's house, who i know because she comes into my job at least once a week, so that was fun. when we were leaving she asked me what days i was working during the week, so she would know when she should come in. we were all ready to leave, but then we noticed a little teeny playground, so we all jumped out of the car and clearly had to play on it and take pictures and whatnot, which was so much fun. afterwards nicole dropped mel off at home, and then she dropped me off.

today i didn't have work, so i didn't do a whole hell of a lot. me and mel were gonna go to roosevelt park, but we ended up not going. i was gonna go over to koni's sister's house with her and mel to watch her nephews, but i wasn't sure if my mom was coming home, so i didn't go. my mom ended up coming home anyway, so i probably could have gone. so i was just sitting around, watching beetlejuice when mel texted me to see what i was doing, so she picked me up, we went over to koni's, hung out for a while there and then took a ride to koni's boyfriend's house, but he ended up not being there anyway, so we went back to koni's until a little after 10 and then i came home. and now, here i am. wide awake.

tomorrow i have work at 9. then i'm hanging out with val. and possibly mel depending on the time and whether or not she finishes homework.

i'm actually getting pretty tired, which is a pretty big shock, so i might watch a little more of beetlejuice and then attempt to sleep because i have to get up by 8:20 at the absolute latest.

ps; i changed my journal up a little and i heart it mucho.

baby's in reno with the vitamin d.

Fri, 15 Apr 2005 05:07:18 GMT

yeahhh, between last night and today (it's technically after midnight, but i haven't slept, so it's still thursday in my book) my mood changed so drastically and i haven't a clue why.

yesterday was a good day. i was supposed to get out of work at 2:30, but i got out at about 2:15 instead because it was mind-blowingly slow, so rose let me leave. so i visited my mom at work, and then went home for a few hours. at around 7 or so mel picked me up and we went over to vintage vinyl and picked up some cds. i really shouldn't have bought anything, but i got two cds for under $20, so that makes it better. we were on driving home when my mom called us to see what we were doing so i told her we had just left vintage vinyl and were just thinking of something else to do. her birthday is coming up pretty soon, and i intended to treat her to dinner, like i do every year, so i suggested that me, her and mel all go out for some dinner. so we met at applebees. mel and i beat my mom there, so we had a punk rock sing-a-long and a car mosh to some mxpx, which, well, how could that not be fun?? so my mom got there, we ate some dinner and i paid for everybody. it was a fun night, definitely lots of laughs, and i'm glad we all went.

when i got home, i don't know. something changed. and i've been in a weird mood ever since. i just hope it goes away soon enough because this weekend should be pretty fun and i don't want to be a big, cynical bitch through it all.

today i drove montana to school and went home and basically did nothing. part of me wanted to go out and find something to do, but the other part of me wanted to laze around in sweatpants and a hoody (my house is freezing and my mom refuses to turn on the heat again until november), hair all a mess and sleep. so i basically did just that.

tomorrow i'm taking chad and montana (or at least montana for sure. chad has been sick the past two days) to school, then going straight to work for 9:00. i'm not sure exactly what i'm doing afterwards yet.

saturday i'm supposed to go to roosevelt park with mel to see a couple of her friends play some music, followed by some frisbee of course lol so hopefully the weather is nice.

sunday i have work at 9:00 and i'm supposed to hang out with val afterwards, which should be pretty fun as i really don't see her that much anymore.

next weekend jimmy goes away! i've been attempting to make plans ahead of time for stuff to do while he goes away, and then again for when my mom goes away on the 29th. so far the only things that look fairly concrete are the strip club and beer pong. amaaaazing.

but for now, i think i'm gonna go to sleep.